On a mini vacation this summer to a family friend’s lake house, I was amazed one night to see two lightening bugs playing with each other — I sat there on the deck and watched them for quite some time. I was also so stunned to see the light of a boat driving by on the lake. These are normal, everyday occurrences for most people, but for me, they are miracles.
You see, more than 20 years ago while I was in college studying journalism and fashion design, I was diagnosed with a rare eye disease called Retinitis Pigmentosa (RP). I saw specialists from Dallas to Germany, and they all told me the same thing — there is no treatment or cure for it and that I needed to learn to be a blind person. I finally did consent to mobility training and learned to use a white cane. However, I’m stubborn when I really want or believe in something. I have never accepted that I will go completely blind — in spite of losing my night vision and most of my peripheral vision — and I’ve always believed that I could be healed. After studying psychology, neuroscience and biology, I know how powerful our minds and bodies are. They can heal themselves. Just cut your finger and watch the process before your very eyes.
Right after Thanksgiving 2015, I changed my diet and started taking supplements, per the advice of a doctor at a wellness center in West Texas. At Christmas break (I was in graduate school at the time studying Clinical Mental Health Counseling) I went to the wellness center for two weeks of detox treatments and monitoring of my diet. (I’m not a morning person, but they forced me to drink carrot juice and protein shakes and eat the approved foods from 8 a.m. to 3 p.m. Then during the early evening and night when I was used to eating because of hunger, food was very limited or not available at all.) Three months later, I was finally able to see a holistic doctor in Houston who a graduate school friend recommended because he had success treating and reversing RP. (The wellness center never had an RP case before, but got me started on the right track.) The doctor further refined my diet and prescribed all new supplements.
In the first nine months, I lost 70 pounds — It was amazing because no matter what I did, I couldn’t lose weight … not even for my wedding or college graduation. However, the vision didn’t seem to be returning very quickly.
I wasn’t born with vision issues. In fact, I had perfect 20/20 vision throughout childhood and my teenage years. In early summer 2018, I saw my first lightening bug since I was a child. Seeing those two playing in summer 2019 at the lake vacation was just a sign from the universe to me that my vision and body were going to make a turnaround.
Just a few days before that trip, I asked my eyes what they were afraid to see. The details of the ugliness in the world? Possibly, but I can still see it every single day — And more importantly, I FEEL it every single day. Just because you can’t see something doesn’t make it go away. I gave myself permission to see the ugly details of the world, observe them and not try to fix them — just let them be as they are.
I also decided on that trip that I was no longer going to allow people to shame this princess because she has physical limitations she is overcoming. We are ALL beautiful and have so many positive gifts to share with the world — I don’t care if you’re fat, skinny, short, tall, straight, gay, confused (most of us are confused in some form or fashion at some point in life) or if you’re a princess with vision issues. We can no longer let the haters put us down or stop us from being used at our full potential!
I’m truly grateful for the little things. They give me hope that bigger and better things are coming soon. I’m also convinced that talking to your body works … even if it takes a while for it to manifest.
What little things are you grateful for and observing in your life today?
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