It’s been a challenging couple of weeks with many of us on Shelter In Place due to COVID-19 concerns. I’ve only left my house twice in the last two weeks, and the grocery run I went on this week resulted in a woman hitting me with my own shopping cart then smirking in delight when I said, “OUCH!” I’m not going to lie … I started thinking really negative thoughts toward her, but I snapped out of it and got away from her as far and as fast as I could. This is one time I can say I didn’t let anyone take my crown. Being cooped up for days on end can have a very negative effect on a person’s mental health. If you’re sheltering in place with negative people, that can be accelerated. Whether your sheltering in place alone or with family members, here is some advice from 2018 on how to stay on your throne in peace and not let anyone take your crown …
I’ve said it many times before, and I’ll say it again: I’m a work in progress. I’m better than I used to be, but I’m still not where I want to be. I want my initial reaction to anything to be that of love and peace, but sometimes it just isn’t. Sometimes, I still let people take my crown, or at least tilt it a little.
I’ve been in crisis, “Get ‘er done” mode at the magazine where I work salvaging a very late issue. I’ve been Princess Senée reporting for duty on the sinking Titanic. I’m doing everything in my power to save this ship. (I’m going to make it happen, even though there may be some parts dangling, the ship will not sink on my watch!) I’ve had the help of a couple of coworkers — to whom I’m eternally grateful for their help and cooperation. However, there are others who have just thrown obstacles in my way. It feels like I’m on the Titanic running around with my hair on fire trying to keep the ship from going under, and they’re in the life boat with their life jackets on screaming at me, “You’re doing it wrong!”
One person heard me asking for a specific name I couldn’t find online for a story I was editing. This person inserted themselves into the conversation telling me to go online (which I had already done). It was so bad I couldn’t even look at this person because, at the very least, they would have seen me rolling my eyes to the back of my head and biting my tongue to keep from saying what I was really feeling — my princess crown was definitely on tilt, and I hated it!
You see, we’re royalty. Our natural state resonates in the high energy of love, integrity and peace. When we allow others externally to bring our energy low to that of anger or frustration, we’ve handed them our crowns and are now allowing them to control our emotions. Christ told us that we are to be passers by. (Like my grandmother used to say, “Shick-a-mo-shy pass them on by!” I was not being an observer in this case, I was mad and frustrated that this person was hindering me from getting the job done and saving the Titanic.
I don’t like myself very much when that happens. I had to go home and forgive myself. I literally said, “Senée, I know you’re under a lot of stress to pull off the impossible and you have been operating in emergency, crisis mode. I know you don’t like how you acted, but I love and forgive you. I know you will do better next time and be the observer faster.”
I spent a whole chapter in The Princess Guide to Healing a Broken Heart talking about forgiving yourself, but it has only been in the last few weeks that I’ve understood why it’s important and how to do it better. Not forgiving yourself binds you with guilt and weights on you. It can even cause you to operate in fear which is the worst thing in the world. Derrick Brose the Global Witness, said that self unforgiveness is like carrying a heavy backpack on your back and wanting to jump off a deep cliff. Instead of jumping, he suggests you take all that heavy unforgiveness, throw that backpack over the cliff and walk way divine, sovereign and free — I agree with him.
Some people feel so powerless in their own lives that they try to exert power over everyone around them to feel powerful. You see this all the time in the workplace with people who have demanding spouses. Is this right or a good excuse? Of course not! However, we have to be the observer and just pass them on by.
Any therapist will tell you that to have peace, you need to observe your thoughts and feelings and let them pass. The same is true for all the external things that happen around you. Don’t pick a side. Just say, “That’s interesting,” and pass them on by.
Billie Eilish says it best when she sings, “If you think I’m pretty, you should see me in a crown!” Don’t waste the pretty and don’t let anyone take your crown!
Senée Seale is a book author, mental health professional and life guide passionate about helping people create positive changes in their lives and relationships. Are you ready to start attracting positive things into your life through practicing daily affirmations? Get your free copy of The Princes Guide to Gratitude Affirmations. For more information on how to have successful relationships and peace of mind, check out the website today!
