Trust yourself: Is it rejection or protection?

I opened my email one day a few months ago to receive a message from a company that was looking for a news reporter with my skills and three years of experience. The message was to tell me that, “After reviewing your resume and submissions the hiring team has decided not to move forward. We wish you all the best.” First of all, I have 23 years of experience, great writing clips and national and international exposure. Secondly, this is a direct copy and paste of their email, and they are missing a comma in their first sentence. But what would someone with 23 years of writing and editing experience know? I mean, after all, they are the ones sending the “rejection letter.”

Honestly, this isn’t the first email like this I’ve received, and it probably won’t be the last. My initial reaction is always outrage. But this time, it turned into laughter … They have no idea who they just rejected or what they will be missing!

I’ve lived life long enough to know that not everything that looks like rejection actually is. So many times in life, the sting of rejection — be it from a job, love interest or friend — can be so strong and debilitating that we can’t see it’s actually protection disguised as rejection.

There was a time in my life when I would mourn the loss of a person or opportunity for so long, thinking my life was over and nothing good would come to replace that perceived loss. I’ve recently looked back over my life at events that I thought were monumental — you know, those grandiose moments that everyone dreams about like getting that dream job or marrying that forever mate — and realized that they were only lessons I needed to learn to push me into the direction of what would truly make me happy.

I’ve realized a lot about myself in the last year, and one thing I know for certain is that my creativity is completely shut down when I’m working in prison-like office conditions where I am monitored like an inmate and expected to churn out creative material like a robot. I’m more like Carrie Bradshaw from Sex and the City … Not the writing a sex column part, but the work from home/coffee shop and touring museums and department stores when needing inspiration to meet deadlines part.

Knowing this information about myself and how I work best is very helpful when I feel the need to try and conform to society’s norms. I’ve NEVER fit it, and I’m fine with that. It’s other people who have a problem with it. Maybe someday I’ll feel comfortable telling you the realizations I’ve had about who I am and where I came from. But for now, just know that I’m a princess from another place, and we don’t fit in on purpose!

As I mentioned earlier, I’ve been looking back over my life at all the experiences I’ve had. I’ve allowed myself to feel the love and joy in particular moments of my life and be grateful that I was honored to experience them. I’ve also looked at the deep, deep rejection I’ve felt from people and realized that if they had not rejected me, I would have been in a miserable position, at the very least. In some cases, it could have cost me my life.

It’s taken a lot of internal work to get to this place in my awakening process, but I’m so grateful that I can see that the rejection I thought would kill me was actually protection from something much worse — jobs, people, men … you name it! It becomes much easier to look at rejection through this lens.

No matter what you have encountered, just know that you were made for great things! You have seeds of greatness within you … Let them out. I love this song It’s amazing by Jem and listen to it all the time to remind myself of who I am and what I am worth:

And I know, ’cause I’ve been there before, Knocking on the doors with rejection (rejection); And you’ll see, ’cause if it’s meant to be; Nothing can compare to deserving your dream. It’s amazing. It’s amazing, all that you can do. It’s amazing. Makes my heart sing; Now it’s up to you.

What protection disguised as rejection in your life are you grateful for?

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