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The beauty of changing seasons

We’ve officially entered a new season — Spring. I’m incredibly grateful for the change. Some people believe that this season is actually the beginning of a new year. I have to agree with them this year and welcome the change.

To say this Winter has been a hard one for me would be a gigantic understatement. Not only have I dealt with some personal issues that I’m writing about in my upcoming book, but January felt like an entire year by itself and I went through a freak Texas snowstorm in February all alone.

The snowstorm (which is rare for us to have snow in North Texas to begin with) put us all back in lockdown again. Two days before the storm hit, I was able to locate firewood in a nearby suburb after days of scouring every store where I usually buy it. I was happy about that, but I did not expect to be without power for three days straight. The management of my complex told us to keep the faucets dripping, the cabinet doors open and the temperature above 55-degrees. The power distributor sent out notices that we should keep our heaters on 68-degrees or lower. Mine was already there.

I’m not going to lie — I am not a camper or someone who is good at surviving in the wilderness. I tried lighting a fire in my fireplace after the power went out, but keeping it going was challenging. Staying warm from it was even harder. Doing something as simple as heating water in a coffee kettle was impossible. I survived on a couple of handfuls of organic tortilla chips per day. I was wearing two layers of pants and tops, five layers of socks and house shoes, a hat, a hooded winter coat, a full-length mink coat and my granny’s fuzzy shearling housecoat. The warmest place in my townhouse was in my bed under every blanket I owned with my head covered. Hot water was non-existent for a couple of days after the power came back on. So, taking a hot bath to warm up wasn’t an option. Going to a hotel with power wasn’t an option, either because I couldn’t drive in snow — I tried driving down the street to get hot coffee and got stuck several times.

Once the electricity came back on, my thermostat said it was 33-degrees inside my house. Just a couple of hours after the electricity came back on with rolling blackouts, water started pouring from my light fixtures in my office and laundry room. It sounded like Niagara Falls inside my townhouse and flooded my laundry room, kitchen, office, hallway and part of my living room floors. Thank God it happened downstairs where I have hardwood floors and that none of my books or electronics were damaged.

I had never been so grateful for coffee and electricity in my life. Like everything else I’ve been through during my existence, I survived, but it really made me wish that I had a partner to go through that hardship with. It was hard on my married friends, but it was even harder on me going through it all by myself. Now, do you see why I’m so happy for a change?

This too shall pass

I’ve written about being grateful for new seasons. We experience new weather seasons about every three months. We also experience new seasons in life. That can look like any big change such as a new job, new relationship, new living location, the birth of a child, etc. It’s important to remember that we need to watch our thinking and attitudes at the beginning of any new season in life.

Senee Seale The Princess Guide
The flowers my grandfather planted decades ago continue to bloom every Spring — nearly 20 years after his death. Hope truly springs eternal.

“It is our attitude at the beginning of a difficult task which, more than anything else, will affect its successful outcome.” wrote William James.

I remember when I moved into my townhouse nearly three years ago. When I move into a new place, I usually sleep so peacefully the first night and wake up happy, refreshed and hopeful. Not so this time. In fact, I had a neighbor call the apartment manager and onsite security on me the first day because her assigned parking spot was directly in front of my private sidewalk and private entrance, and my moving truck was temporarily parked there while my things were being unloaded. The bullying continued for months, unfortunately. I remember having my sleep interrupted many times during that first night — very unusual for me since I sleep soundly once I fall asleep. I woke up the next day basically crying and in internal turmoil. I thought many times during the first few months about moving. That was a serious thought since I hate moving with a passion.

Things have gotten better. It’s like the saying goes, “This too shall pass.” I had to feel the negative emotions caused by an outside person, release them and continue on with my life focusing on the positive things. Sometimes, new seasons appear to be negative because of choices we’ve made in previous seasons or because of people outside ourselves causing us problems because of jealousy, insecurity, a sense of entitlement or just because they think they can. It’s very important in these times to let the process play out, focus on being positive, practice gratitude and loving yourself first.

Endings are really new beginnings

Change is always an opportunity for growth — no matter if you experience positive or negative circumstances. You get to determine how outside events will affect you. I recommend allowing the pressure to create diamonds and the fire to refine you like pure gold. Keeping the faith and keeping hope alive will make a big difference in your outlook on life.

Endings don’t have to be negative things. They can be the catalyst to propel you to greater things and positive transformation — you decide.

“When something ends it seems like the end of something,” wrote Hemal Radi. “Consider that the ending of it was actually part of the process of something new beginning.”

I’m not pretending that being positive in the face of negativity is easy. It certainly isn’t. However, like Dr. Wayne Dyer used to say, “What you focus on expands.” I’ve found this to be true. Psychology calls it a self-fulfilling prophesy. So, it’s imperative that you focus on the good things, things that are true, lovely, of good report [Philippians 4:8]. I don’t care what anyone says … If it makes you feel good (even if it’s just a daydream) this is what you need to focus on. Dr. Dyer used to say that since God is good, feeling good is feeling God. I wholeheartedly agree.

Take care of you

Sometimes, (and I believe it should be often in today’s society) it’s important to take a break during a new season. You may not be able to take a week off for a Spring Break, but you can turn your phone off on weekends and evenings or refuse to respond to or entertain negative people. You can have lunch in a beautiful place that makes your heart flutter, take a walk in nature, go to the lake or even watch beach movies and let yourself dream about the life you want to have. If you crave a change of scenery or location but you can’t afford one at the moment, you can always clean out your current living space, rearrange the furniture or do small renovations or furniture repurposing. Taking a hot bubble bath and pampering yourself is another way to rejuvenate your spirit on the cheap. This is all called good self-care. It was drilled into me during graduate school and is imperative for positive mental health.

Being authentic, practicing good self-care and focusing on being the best you that you can be is imperative. “Wake up every morning with a greater sense of self and the courage to let the true you shine,” Dr. Sue Morter.

Take the time this new season to stop and smell the flowers, enjoy the warmer weather, get outside and appreciate nature and do the things that make you feel good. Here’s to a new season.

Senée Seale is a book author, mental health professional and life guide passionate about helping people create positive changes in their lives and relationships. Are you ready to start attracting positive things into your life through practicing daily affirmations? Get your free copy of The Princes Guide to Gratitude Affirmations. If you’d like to work directly with Senée, she’s accepting new clients.

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Does everyone hit rock bottom?

By the time you read this post, you have probably spent the entire Thanksgiving Day with drunk Uncle So-and-so, and you may be wondering if he will ever get sober.

In this Flashback Friday post we’re exploring the concept of hitting rock bottom and making positive changes in life. As I’ve said many times before, change is not easy — if it were then everyone would practice it on a regular basis — but the rewards and benefits of positive change are well worth the struggle during the process. You don’t have to hit rock bottom and have everything in your life fall to ruin before you decide to make those positive changes. Let’s explore this topic …

I recently took a long road trip, and that gave me a lot of time to think. (When I’m holding on to the steering wheel for six hours straight, that’s a long enough trip for me to consider it a long road trip!) Surprisingly, I was thinking about substance use and the people I know who have been hurt by it (both the users and the ones who love them).

I know substance users who have been jailed, sentenced to prison, had their children taken away by the state, lost jobs, destroyed their marriages and on and on. In one particular case, I knew of someone who lost her children and many years later died of a drug overdose before she could make positive changes even though she had many chances to initiate change. I wonder if these people ever hit rock bottom, repent and try to make things right with those they have hurt while imitating positive change in their lives?

Does everyone hit rock bottom?

My best friend believes that often men do not hit rock bottom after they hurt girlfriends and wives so much that the women leave. She says the rock bottom comes from their children. I wasn’t so sure about her theory until I saw it happen to a man I know. It appeared that he was in the contemplation phase of change when his relationship with his children improved. So, I’m guessing that the daily drinking didn’t stop and he didn’t enter into a treatment program, but it looked like the children leaving the relationship with him was causing him to take a serious look at treatment.

When I was thinking about these people who don’t seem to ever hit rock bottom, I saw a picture in my mind of someone falling and falling and falling in a deep, deep pit.

I believe when we do things that destroy out bodies, destroy our lives, destroy our brains, destroy our relationships, destroy our reputations and destroy those around us, we are being influenced by demonic forces that are deployed to carry out Satan’s mission to “steal, kill and destroy” (John 10:10).

I know someone who seems like a good, genuine person who loves God on the surface, but his addiction to alcohol has destroyed his life. I’ve only known him to be clean and sober while in jail (and that’s a place where he’s spent a lot of time). It’s really hard to watch anyone go through life in the chains of substance use, but they are the only ones who can change it. I was told by a professor that substance users typically don’t decide to seriously work a recovery program and make the positive changes needed until they have been in rehab about EIGHT times.

Treatment and recovery programs are wonderful tools in becoming clean and sober, but if you don’t deal with the root cause of why you use and create a heart change, you will fall back into destructive patterns. Dealing with those deep issues can be very scary because we’ve lived with them for so long and coped by using substances to medicate our broken hearts and crushed spirits that it feels “normal,” but freedom from being controlled by substances feels so much better!

We are not guaranteed tomorrow (just like the person I mentioned who died of an overdose before she made positive changes). The “magic” of the present moment is that it’s the gift of being able to institute change right now. Are you ready to change for the better?

You can find these Flashback Friday blogs posted every Friday. If you want to know more how to have successful relationships and peace of mind, you can get a free PDF sample chapter of “The Princess Guide to Healing a Broken Heart” by filling out the form in the sidebar on this page.