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The beauty of changing seasons

We’ve officially entered a new season — Spring. I’m incredibly grateful for the change. Some people believe that this season is actually the beginning of a new year. I have to agree with them this year and welcome the change.

To say this Winter has been a hard one for me would be a gigantic understatement. Not only have I dealt with some personal issues that I’m writing about in my upcoming book, but January felt like an entire year by itself and I went through a freak Texas snowstorm in February all alone.

The snowstorm (which is rare for us to have snow in North Texas to begin with) put us all back in lockdown again. Two days before the storm hit, I was able to locate firewood in a nearby suburb after days of scouring every store where I usually buy it. I was happy about that, but I did not expect to be without power for three days straight. The management of my complex told us to keep the faucets dripping, the cabinet doors open and the temperature above 55-degrees. The power distributor sent out notices that we should keep our heaters on 68-degrees or lower. Mine was already there.

I’m not going to lie — I am not a camper or someone who is good at surviving in the wilderness. I tried lighting a fire in my fireplace after the power went out, but keeping it going was challenging. Staying warm from it was even harder. Doing something as simple as heating water in a coffee kettle was impossible. I survived on a couple of handfuls of organic tortilla chips per day. I was wearing two layers of pants and tops, five layers of socks and house shoes, a hat, a hooded winter coat, a full-length mink coat and my granny’s fuzzy shearling housecoat. The warmest place in my townhouse was in my bed under every blanket I owned with my head covered. Hot water was non-existent for a couple of days after the power came back on. So, taking a hot bath to warm up wasn’t an option. Going to a hotel with power wasn’t an option, either because I couldn’t drive in snow — I tried driving down the street to get hot coffee and got stuck several times.

Once the electricity came back on, my thermostat said it was 33-degrees inside my house. Just a couple of hours after the electricity came back on with rolling blackouts, water started pouring from my light fixtures in my office and laundry room. It sounded like Niagara Falls inside my townhouse and flooded my laundry room, kitchen, office, hallway and part of my living room floors. Thank God it happened downstairs where I have hardwood floors and that none of my books or electronics were damaged.

I had never been so grateful for coffee and electricity in my life. Like everything else I’ve been through during my existence, I survived, but it really made me wish that I had a partner to go through that hardship with. It was hard on my married friends, but it was even harder on me going through it all by myself. Now, do you see why I’m so happy for a change?

This too shall pass

I’ve written about being grateful for new seasons. We experience new weather seasons about every three months. We also experience new seasons in life. That can look like any big change such as a new job, new relationship, new living location, the birth of a child, etc. It’s important to remember that we need to watch our thinking and attitudes at the beginning of any new season in life.

Senee Seale The Princess Guide
The flowers my grandfather planted decades ago continue to bloom every Spring — nearly 20 years after his death. Hope truly springs eternal.

“It is our attitude at the beginning of a difficult task which, more than anything else, will affect its successful outcome.” wrote William James.

I remember when I moved into my townhouse nearly three years ago. When I move into a new place, I usually sleep so peacefully the first night and wake up happy, refreshed and hopeful. Not so this time. In fact, I had a neighbor call the apartment manager and onsite security on me the first day because her assigned parking spot was directly in front of my private sidewalk and private entrance, and my moving truck was temporarily parked there while my things were being unloaded. The bullying continued for months, unfortunately. I remember having my sleep interrupted many times during that first night — very unusual for me since I sleep soundly once I fall asleep. I woke up the next day basically crying and in internal turmoil. I thought many times during the first few months about moving. That was a serious thought since I hate moving with a passion.

Things have gotten better. It’s like the saying goes, “This too shall pass.” I had to feel the negative emotions caused by an outside person, release them and continue on with my life focusing on the positive things. Sometimes, new seasons appear to be negative because of choices we’ve made in previous seasons or because of people outside ourselves causing us problems because of jealousy, insecurity, a sense of entitlement or just because they think they can. It’s very important in these times to let the process play out, focus on being positive, practice gratitude and loving yourself first.

Endings are really new beginnings

Change is always an opportunity for growth — no matter if you experience positive or negative circumstances. You get to determine how outside events will affect you. I recommend allowing the pressure to create diamonds and the fire to refine you like pure gold. Keeping the faith and keeping hope alive will make a big difference in your outlook on life.

Endings don’t have to be negative things. They can be the catalyst to propel you to greater things and positive transformation — you decide.

“When something ends it seems like the end of something,” wrote Hemal Radi. “Consider that the ending of it was actually part of the process of something new beginning.”

I’m not pretending that being positive in the face of negativity is easy. It certainly isn’t. However, like Dr. Wayne Dyer used to say, “What you focus on expands.” I’ve found this to be true. Psychology calls it a self-fulfilling prophesy. So, it’s imperative that you focus on the good things, things that are true, lovely, of good report [Philippians 4:8]. I don’t care what anyone says … If it makes you feel good (even if it’s just a daydream) this is what you need to focus on. Dr. Dyer used to say that since God is good, feeling good is feeling God. I wholeheartedly agree.

Take care of you

Sometimes, (and I believe it should be often in today’s society) it’s important to take a break during a new season. You may not be able to take a week off for a Spring Break, but you can turn your phone off on weekends and evenings or refuse to respond to or entertain negative people. You can have lunch in a beautiful place that makes your heart flutter, take a walk in nature, go to the lake or even watch beach movies and let yourself dream about the life you want to have. If you crave a change of scenery or location but you can’t afford one at the moment, you can always clean out your current living space, rearrange the furniture or do small renovations or furniture repurposing. Taking a hot bubble bath and pampering yourself is another way to rejuvenate your spirit on the cheap. This is all called good self-care. It was drilled into me during graduate school and is imperative for positive mental health.

Being authentic, practicing good self-care and focusing on being the best you that you can be is imperative. “Wake up every morning with a greater sense of self and the courage to let the true you shine,” Dr. Sue Morter.

Take the time this new season to stop and smell the flowers, enjoy the warmer weather, get outside and appreciate nature and do the things that make you feel good. Here’s to a new season.

Senée Seale is a book author, mental health professional and life guide passionate about helping people create positive changes in their lives and relationships. Are you ready to start attracting positive things into your life through practicing daily affirmations? Get your free copy of The Princes Guide to Gratitude Affirmations. If you’d like to work directly with Senée, she’s accepting new clients.

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Flashback Friday: Are you willing to go through the transformation to become a butterfly?

I heard a local weatherman saying this week that meteorological Spring begins March 1. So, this week, we’re thinking about flowers and warm weather, and flashing back to 2017 to talk about butterflies and the transformation process …

I was at a minister’s conference recently and was talking with a pastor and his family at lunch one day about the book I’m writing. I was explaining how during this process I have been seeing a vision of a butterfly.

I like butterflies and even chose a butterfly garden wedding china pattern, but I’ve never been really crazy about them until now. One day, I realized that I will never crawl on my belly again like a worm because I am being transformed into a beautiful butterfly that will fly above every situation and see the full picture and truth of the matter. 

I told the pastor and his family about how I keep thinking about being in that cocoon — You may be in a cocoon near others in one, but it’s a process you must go through alone. That process has to be painful for the caterpillar, but as long as no one interferes, it will emerge as a beautiful butterfly. The pastor said all the ministers sitting in the dining room with us were in cocoons — It was a cocoon conference.

I’ve learned that you just hold on, and let the transformation take place. The key is to enjoy your cocoon time even if you feel like you’re being hidden and overlooked.

The Princess Guide Senee Seale

It’s very important to note that if someone outside cuts open the cocoon, the transformation stops and the worm/butterfly dies. Protect your cocoon. Don’t let anyone “help” you through the process because it will kill the transformation and could kill you spiritually/emotionally. I’m not talking about seeking guidance from therapists or clergy, I’m talking about getting involved in new relationships here. I don’t advertise it. Once you get inside that cocoon, there’s no turning back.

You know, there’s a reason when you’re working a recovery program that you’re given a sponsor of your same gender and are told not to start a new romantic relationship for a year or two … It’s harder to heal and transform in the presence of the opposite sex. The time will come when you can spend time with whomever you want, but the purpose of the process is transformation, and that can’t happen with outside influence. Lasting change, real transformation, can only happen in the cocoon! You need to learn to question all your motives and decisions to make sure your intentions and heart are pure, and that you’re going into situations that will benefit you and send you further into your calling.

I was counseling someone on this topic, and was asked, “How do I know I’m out of the cocoon?” I think you just know. People keep telling me how much I’ve changed — not only on the outside, but that I’m different inside. I’m starting to see that because I’m thinking differently and not reacting to everything like I used to. Things that used to be acceptable to me no longer are … My standards are higher. I don’t feel like I’m operating from a place of desperation — that place that will cause you to make bad choices every time. Now, I’m constantly asking myself, “Is this something a princess would do? Is this living to a higher, royal standard?”

I believe when things that used to deeply hurt you no longer have an effect on how you feel about yourself, then you’ll be out of the cocoon. During this process, it’s important to remember that all lasting change begins in the mind.

When we focus on gratitude and the positive things in our lives, we are literally changing our brains by creating new neuropathways. Focus on the positives and all the progress you have made, then you will be able to see the changes.

Senée Seale is a book author, mental health professional and life guide passionate about helping people create positive changes in their lives and relationships. Are you ready to start attracting positive things into your life through practicing daily affirmations? Get your free copy of The Princes Guide to Gratitude Affirmations. For more information on how to have successful relationships and peace of mind, check out the website today!